Smoking a bong at Oxford brought back memories of Taliban attack, says Pakistan’s Nobel laureate Malala Yousafzai
Pakistan’s first Nobel Peace Prize laureate, Malala Yousafzai, shared that smoking a bong for the first time while studying at Oxford University brought back repressed memories of the Taliban assassination attempt she survived as a teenager in her hometown. Malala became a household name after she was attacked by Pakistan Taliban militants on a school bus in the remote Swat Valley in 2012. Yousafzai, now 28, was later evacuated to the United Kingdom and went on to become a global advocate for girls’ education, earning the Nobel Peace Prize at 17.
What did Malala say about the resurfacing memories?
In an interview with The Guardian, Malala shared that her time at Lady Margaret Hall, Oxford, brought back vivid memories of the Taliban attack and her early years living under their rule. “I had never felt so close to the attack as then, in that moment,” she said. “I felt like I was reliving all of it, and there was a time when I just thought I was in the afterlife.”
How did the incident affect her mental health?
She recalled attempting to walk back to her room after smoking but blacking out and being carried by a friend. The moment triggered flashbacks of the day she was shot — the gun, the blood, and being rushed through the crowd to an ambulance.
Malala said the incident had a deep impact on her mental health, leading to anxiety and panic attacks.
“I’m the girl who was shot … I’m supposed to be a brave girl,” she said. “Until I couldn’t pretend any longer. I’d be sweating and shaking and I could hear my heart beat. Then I started getting panic attacks.”
How did she cope with the trauma?
With her therapist’s help, Malala slowly worked through the flashbacks and intense emotions. She came to understand that exam pressure, combined with buried memories from her childhood, had overwhelmed her.
“I survived an attack,” she said. “And nothing happened to me, and I laughed it off. I thought nothing could scare me, nothing. My heart was so strong. And then I was scared of small things, and that just broke me.”
What does Malala say about bravery now?
Reflecting on her journey, she added, “But, you know, in this journey I realised what it means to be actually brave — when you can not only fight the real threats out there, but fight within.”
