Smith, for his part, has long seen through the Archer hyperbole. When Stuart Broad suggested, after the notorious Lord’s face-off, that his fellow seamer would be demanding the ball as soon as Smith made his way to the middle, the man himself shrugged: “I’m not going to change anything – there has been a bit of talk that he has got the wood over me, but he hasn’t actually got me out.” Fast-forward to these intense hostilities in Brisbane, and he is still able to make the same boast.
In fairness, Archer deserved far better throughout England’s torrid ordeal. Having all but locked Travis Head down, he watched in despair as the lethal opener edged to Jamie Smith, who put it down. It was the same story in the night session, with Carse spilling a straightforward chance when Michael Neser’s cut shot flew straight to him. Archer could barely look, wiping his brow and glowering at the turf. It was frankly absurd, for all his accuracy and economy, that he claimed only one wicket to Carse’s three. But then there seems no limit to England’s capacity for absurdity in the cauldron of these Ashes tours. Whether in the individual or collective battle of wills, they lose their grip far too quickly, and far too easily.
