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It was easy to point and giggle at “The Spands” back in 1980. The over-hyped and over-styled boy band, with its over the top spokesman, the once omnipresent Gary Kemp, even had ‘a movement’ behind them, the nightclub kids calling themselves the ‘New Romantics’. They were hardly The Clash, with their song about the assassination of Federico García Lorca or The Specials with their chart-topping warning of the dangers of teenage pregnancy, so could be dismissed as lightweight. To cut a long story short, us NME readers sneered – a privilege of youth, I suppose.
Then, after another thumb in the nose of Serious Fans Of Rock Music with the unintentionally hilarious video for “Musclebound”, Spandau Ballet delivered a perfect moment of Blue Eyed Soul with “Chant No. 1 (I Don’t Need This Pressure On)”. I bought it on 12 inch single and, a few weeks before I left home for London, I could recite its closing rap, word for word, my future in eight lines.
“You go down, down
🎭 NEW! UK Theatre Newsletter
Pass the Talk of Town
You go down Greek Street
Then it’s underground
Well it’s Soho life
For this mobile knife
It’s the place to shoot
Friday night Beat Route”
Pushing a half century on, in the Royal Albert Hall toilets, you’re more likely to be offered Viagra and Ozempic than the coke and speed at The Beat Route, but, hey, we all grow old.
Except, maybe, Tony Hadley, lead singer of the 80s popsters, who barely looks any different at 65 and, as someone who heard him sing at the legendary Liverpool Empire gig in 1982, barely sounds any different either. There’s must be a portrait in an attic somewhere…
He still knows his audience though, so it’s a Radio 2 songlist of classics made famous by the great names of easy listening. Stand by to hear namechecks for Sammy Davis Jr, Tony Bennett, Frank Sinatra, Elvis Presley and many more – The Pantheon essentially. It’s a crowdpleasing set of tunes too. “Music To Watch Girls By” (unapologetically politically incorrect, which TH enjoyed), “If I Can Dream” (not quite Elvis, but who is?) and, inevitably, “My Way” (this show gives the punters what they want). Some in there were new to me, and I know my way round that corner of the market, so I doubt anyone could say it was all too familiar.
Though we all knew three of the songs very well indeed. Phones out now, he rolled out “True”, “Gold” coming to a wedding reception near you soon. Then “Through the Barricades”, with an underlining of its message of peace – alas one that did not seem to extend to Gary Kemp, who wrote the song, the bitter feud between the old bandmates seemingly continuing unabated.
The band are tremendous, brass big and bold, always sounding strong in a venue built for music and with plenty of percussion to hold the beat and snap the snares. It was (and I suspect this too was a concession to the sixtysomethings in the house) not too loud either, so that mushiness in the ears was largely avoided.
The show was a little thin. These days, one expects a big screen and maybe a guest vocalist, but this is Tony’s show and Tony is what you get. As the evening finished with a trio of Christmas songs, a bit of singalong fun and prostates could find relief at last, I suspect few of the audience would have complained.
A chance to relive one’s youth, dad-dance better than Donald Trump (even I can do that) and hear songs for which you seem to know every word, and always have, is a potent mix for sale. And, come on now, my generation have got to (shamelessly) spend those gold-plated and triple-locked pensions somewhere, haven’t we?
Tony Hadley – The Christmas Big Band Tour is on tour until 17 December
Photo images: Andy Paradise
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