Ashes 2025: Cummins leads from the front to leave England’s Ashes hopes in tatters

“I dare say it’s been probably a little bit of shock to Pat’s system, just with the hard conditions,” Lyon said. “Nothing but proud of Pat. That’s a good old-fashioned Test cricket day. That was extremely hot out there. I’m extremely proud of the quick bowlers … and credit to all the fans in the crowd.”

DRS drama also flared up, with Jamie Smith both a beneficiary and a victim of appeals aided by “Snicko” technology, eventually out caught behind for 22.

England captain Ben Stokes gathers himself during a drinks break on day two.Credit: Getty Images

Players’ confidence in Snicko is now at rock bottom following a string of confusing referrals, prompting Mitchell Starc to yell at one stage, “Snicko needs to be sacked. That’s the worst technology ever.”

It will take a miracle for England to win the Ashes. They must haul themselves back into this match, overturn a likely first-innings deficit and post a famous victory, then win in Melbourne and Sydney, having secured only one Test victory on Australian soil in the past 15 years.

As he did in Brisbane, Stokes took his ego out of the game and knuckled down, crawling at a strike rate of 29.8 this same team would have sniggered at a few years ago, when they regularly rolled along at better than a run a ball.

By stumps, Stokes had reached 45 off 151 balls, having battled cramp.

“I know his strike rate is down, but it’s very hard to row an 11-man boat by yourself,” former Australian coach Justin Langer said in commentary for Channel Seven.

“He’s trying so hard for his team. He’s talking about working hard, fighting hard. He just has no-one going with him. In contrast, Australia have 11 guys all working together.”

Whether it was Cameron Green striking with his second ball – finding Harry Brook’s edge for 45 – or Scott Boland sending down a sensational spell of 2-1 from five overs, Australia’s blueprint of remaining calm worked a treat.

The Bazball project is in ruins. Stokes’ heated exchange with Archer encapsulated a camp clinging on for dear life.

“Those images of that heated [Stokes and Archer] exchange sums up what the tour has been for England,” retired great Adam Gilchrist said on Fox Cricket.

“They came in with this game plan … that they have stuck by for so long, but it has literally disintegrated in basically seven and a half days of cricket. There is uncertainty and disagreements about what the plan should be.”

The English mood was best summed up by broadcaster Piers Morgan, who declared after day one of the series that Stokes was the greatest Englishman since Winston Churchill.

“Right, no mucking around, England,” Morgan wrote to his 8.6 million followers on X. “I want these last two wickets taken asap, and I want 400 on the board by close. Flat pitch, hot day, no excuses.”

Six hours later, with England in disarray, Morgan wrote: “FFS” alongside three red angry-face emojis.

It took Lyon 165 days to take his 563rd Test wicket – drawing level with McGrath – but just another three minutes to move into outright second on Australia’s all-time list behind Shane Warne (708).

Lyon had been “filthy” at missing out in Brisbane but backed up his pre-Test declaration that he didn’t have anything to prove by dismissing Ollie Pope (3) and Ben Duckett (29) in his opening over, prompting McGrath in the commentary box to pretend he was throwing a chair in anger.

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The chair gag was cooked up with former Australia paceman Damien Fleming, but in truth McGrath was brimming with pride as Lyon finished the day with 2-51 from 22 overs.

“What a bowler. Nathan Lyon deserves to get that,” McGrath said on the BBC.

Lyon added: “I grew up idolising Shane Warne and Glenn McGrath. These guys were my heroes.”

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